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iPad Pro: My Story in Tweets

Apple’s newest tablet, announced earlier today, isn’t on my shopping list. At 12.9 inches, the screen on the iPad Pro is too big. The device can’t comfortably fit the hands for long periods of time. I have experience with 12-inchers. I will likely keep my iPad Air 2, unless Google comes out with some gotta-have Nexus tab before Apple starts selling its beast in November.

The media event marks a big day for the fruit-logo company, which also introduced new Apple Watch models. That’s code for same internals with more case color and band choices. Apple TV gets a big refresh, and new iPhones are queued up for preorders starting Saturday September 12. The company usually does Friday, but that’s the 9-11 terrorist attack anniversary. 

My competent colleagues banged out spot news stories for BetaNews, while I took to Twitter; as is my custom. I purposely turn the critical eye because so many other tech writers won’t. With that introduction, I present my real-time reaction to the keynote in tweets, from my Twitter, in chronological order (consider the bunch to be quotes, without quotation marks around them):

  • It’s so hot in San Diego, last thing I want: Watch Apple tell us how buying its new stuff will make the world better.
  • Obviously I’m not in SF at the #AppleEvent. Oh, Tim Cook is on the stage. “Good Morning!”
  • Did Steve Jobs draw crowds like this, or it just the venue? #AppleEvent Tim Cook promises “monster announcements”.
  • See: Tim Cook tells us how Apple Watch is “life changing”. It’s more ‘buy more pricey Apple tech to save the planet’.
  • Facebook Messenger is coming to #AppleWatch. Outstanding! Now I can charge the device twice as often.
  • I must admit that the #AppleWatch UI is prettier than #AndroidWear, and Apple builds a real app platform.
  • So Apple is partnering with Hermes for a new #AppleWatch? Isn’t it the same thing with new straps?
  • New #AppleWatch models are still the same inside. The Red Edition is pretty.
  • WatchOS 2 arrives Sept. 16.
  • Tim Cook calls iPad Apple’s vision for the future of personal computing. Good thing tablet sales are declining, eh?
  • Do you remember “Star Trek: The Motion Picture” and all those Enterprise shots? That’s the promo for the iPad 12. [vid plays]
  • Phil Schiller boasts about iPad 12 and the “bigger display”. Your movies are more “cinematic”. Screen is 12.9 inches.
  • I need to watch the replay and count how many times Phil Schiller says “amazing”, “big”, and “huge”.
  • “Faster than 80 percent of PCs that shipped in the last 12 months”, Phil Schiller claims. Show me the apps, Phil.
  • “Four speaker sound system” that balances audio, Phil Schiller says. That’s innovation 5 years in the making, eh? [every other has speaker grill on one side]
  • Ha! iPad 12 “Smart keyboard”. Copycats! Are you going to let this slide #microsoft #surfacepro fans?
  • “Apple pencil?” Good Lord, and a Jony Ive video to introduce.
  • “Apple Pencil”. So what? Steve Jobs won’t roll over in his grave because it’s not named stylus. [he said the company would never do one]
  • What’s new here other than the marketing presentation? But we will read gaga blogs about iPad 12 for days!
  • Phil Schiller calls “Apple Pencil” an “incredible new innovation”. Seriously?
  • Ha! Microsoft exec boasts about iPad 12 and Apple Pencil for Office. From the company maing #surfacepro?
  • Eric Snowden showing Adobe apps on iPad 12. Ah, gee, I let my Creative Cloud sub expire on Sept. 3.
  • Is it a marketing gimmick? $19.99 seems so much less than $20. New iPad: 12.9 inches. A 13-inch tab is bulky to handle.
  • Whoa, iPad Pro isn’t available until November. Starts at $799 for (cough, cough) 32GB storage.
  • November availability means we will suffer gaga fan blog posts for two more months about #iPadPro. Save us!
  • Oh what did I miss? Jony Ive’s voice put me to sleep. How long is this #iPadPro video?
  • iPad mini 4 gets glossed over, even though its new today. It’s #399.
  • I watch the #AppleEvent from a crusty AppleTV. Tim Cook is about to announce its replacement.
  • Tim Cook says TV innovation has been “standing still”. What planet is he living on?
  • We need a new foundation for TV…that runs a modern operating system”, Tim Cook says. What? Amazon and Google don’t?
  • The new AppleTV promo is pretty good. But it looks copycat. Amazon, Google, Microsoft, etc.
  • Tim Cook says the new Apple TV is the “future of TV”. Yeah, but what’s new here that others don’t offer?
  • Voice search, Eddie Cue? By asking Siri? Did your devs raid Amazon, Google, and Microsoft R&D?
  • Real innovation would be asking Siri to FIND Edward Norton in the movie. Show Apple the money, @google. Surely you can. [demo shows fast-forward to discover]
  • Okay, the “who’s in the movie” feature is good.
  • “The future of TV is apps”, Eddie Cue says. Features “tvOS”. That’s lowercase TV because Apple ‘Think Different’.
  • Say, @google, you better get your Android TV ass in gear. Apple presents a TV development platform.
  • “What about shopping on your couch?” Eddie Cue asks. Are you watching this demo, @amazon?
  • Is anyone wondering about “One More Thing” seeing what Apple already announced? Can new iPhone be that good?
  • New #AppleTV sells for $149 or $199 in 32GB and 64GB capacities. Sales start in October. Old model is $69.
  • Here comes #iphone. Tim Cook says “growing by leaps and bounds”–“three-and-a-half times the rest of the industry”.
  • “How do you follow a success like this?” Tim Cook asks. Save us! Rose gold to match new #AppleWatch? [as seen on promo vid]
  • Tim Cook boasts about how iPhone saves the world. New models are the 6s and 6s Plus.
  • Tim Cook calls the new iPhones [the] “most advanced smartphones in the world”. Seriously?
  • My eyes are dropping again. Jony Ive’s voice. “Whole new dimension the way you experience your iPhone”. 3D Touch. [another video plays]
  • For the most advanced smartphones, they sure look like the old ones. Wow, “more precise level of haptic feedback”. [deep sarcasm]
  • I am so impressed with Apple’s 3-D Touch obsession, when the future is touchless, voice-interaction. Way to innovate! [even more sarcastic]
  • I thought Phil Schiller said Canine chip not A9 chip. Must have been the dancing dog demo. [in demo from Instagram]
  • iPhone 6s and 6s Plus cameras go to 12MP. New sensor.
  • Phil Schiller’s explanation about the pixel problem–too many on the sensor–is accurate enough. [about the only thing he said all day free of BS-marketing]
  • 12MP photos mean larger files and more costly iCloud storage. Gee, thanks for the innovation, Apple.
  • “Live Photos?” Doesn’t #googlephotos do something like this in the cloud, for free?
  • Yes, Phil Schiller, but can watch Live Photos on non-Apple platforms? #AppleEvent Or did I miss mention?
  • New iPhone prices and configs as the old.
  • Preorders start Sept. 12 and available Sept. 25.
  • #ios9 will be available on Sept. 16.
  • Apple Store now offers iPhone Upgrade Program. Get a new device every year. Pay monthly fee, which includes AppleCare.
  • New iCloud pricing. 1TB is $9.99 month. For comparison: Google Drive gives 15GB free; photos are free; 1TB same as Apple.
  • Does Tim Cook seem believable saying OneRepublic is one of his favorite bands? [the band performs]
  • Well, if #iPadPro is the future of computing, Apple didn’t need to push new Macs, eh? [no new models or price changes]
  • I like OneRepublic but would @TheXFactor judges give the group four yeses for this performance?

That’s a wrap.

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