The 2015 holiday Android Collectible is Bingle Bear. U.S. Postal Service delivered him about 40 hours ago—in two days, despite the holiday rush, and shipped immediately, too. Thank you Andrew Bell and Dead Zebra. His […]
Category: Oddlies
Google, Give Thanks!
Another Thanksgiving is upon us, as Americans stuff their bellies with turkey and vittles, before falling asleep during the afternoon football game. It’s the day of family feuds, too much food, and setting the mood for the holiday season ahead.
We also count our blessings and give thanks for the year behind. I got to wondering what Google can be grateful for and compiled a short list for you. Perhaps you would like to add to it in comments or lash out at my lack of sensitivity on this special day. Please do. With that brief introduction, I present 5 things for which Google can give thanks, served in no particular order of importance.
The ‘Cesarean is Safer’ Lie
So I’m sitting at McDonald’s with my 93 year-old father-in-law, who likes to eat from the all-day breakfast menu for lunch. Behind him, across the aisle, sit three elderly gents who don’t look to be quite as old but nevertheless it’s a 70-plus group. They gather daily apparently.
One man announces that he can’t make lunch tomorrow. “My daughter is having a baby”. When, another geezer asks. “At 9:30 in the morning” is the answer. “How do you know?” I could answer that one, and the reason why. I lean forward and listen with greater focus. “She’s having a Cesarean”, the man answers. What he says next chills my bones and inflames my anger: The doctor says that the procedure is “safer” than natural childbirth.
A Lesson in Perception
So I’m driving down my street behind this white pickup truck going unusually slow before speeding up then hitting the brakes. Repeatedly. My frustration mounts. But at one-cross street, I finally see around. There is a sedan in the lead, driving in obviously taunting manner. The scenario is obvious: Pickup truck tail-gated, and the other drive retaliates. His vehicle moves along, the truck moves in closer, and he slows down. I’ve seen this kind of thing before.
All the while, I can see from arm waving in the cab that the pickup driver grows increasing angry. Road rage in front turns into retaliation rage behind, I trail both vehicles. Finally, after a few more abrupt slowdowns, the sedan comes to a four-way stoplight, where the truck roars left around, cutting in front of the car and making an illegal right on red. When the light turns green, the four-door pulls up behind the white two-door. Now aggressions are reversed.
When Google Goes Down On You
Two days after Google created Alphabet as the primary company, under which the search engine operation is now a subsidiary, Urban Dictionary has a little fun. Word of the Day is “alphabet“, and I will […]
This is How the Economist Looks on My iPad Air 2
Do you see anything missing? Nothing essential other than most of the content per page. At times like these my paranoia meter rises and I resist, often with difficulty, giving in to conspiracy theories.
This problem started with installation of iOS 9 Beta (second now). The operating system makes changes to the Newsstand, which future role is questionable. Apple is prepping a new Flipboard-like News app and content deals with it. I always wonder who exerts pressure on whom during the licensing negotiations process.
Don’t Go There
While sitting with my 93 year-old father-in-law outside the Starbucks in San Diego’s Hillcrest district, I observed a directional sign for two shops, today. Then I read them as a sentence and laughed. Okay, you—think like an imaginative kid and not a stuck-up-the-butt literal adult: Ignore the K. It’s funny, yes?
Strangely, I came to live the sign not long later. As we walked into Trader Joe’s, a neighbor said hello on her way inside. I politely introduced my father-n-law, then she started on about the Neighborhood Watch group that she recently organized. The first meeting went well, but she wasn’t sure how to contact me. That’s when I blew her holy smoke up her arse.
Hey, Tidal, ‘Sprechen Sie Deutsch?’
While writing a scathing commentary about Apple’s reported policy of stiffing artists for the first three months of its music service (play for no pay), I use Tidal. The streamer’s so-called HiFi music is best […]
Shattered Dreams: When Apple Watch Falls From the Wrist
Saturday afternoon, new Apple Watch owner Ken Lecomte posted a frightening photo to Google+: His device with shattered screen. The spider-spray pattern is eerily familiar—one seen so many times—like an iPhone clumsily dropped to floor or pavement. The fruit-logo company boasts about the gadget being a wrist computer, but should it be as easily breakable as the other that customers carry?
I contacted him yesterday, and he shared his story, providing photos that also authenticate him as the watch’s owner. The problem with Ken’s story isn’t truthfulness but lies spun around it. Fanboyism is a cancer that spreads across any tale like his. Already, accusers flame his original post and others resharing it. Apple defenders are venomous. “I’ve been amazed with the amount of negativity”, he says. “It seems a lot of people just can’t believe that Apple could make a product that could break or have a design problem”.
Meanwhile, Apple critics call for label strapgate; there have been too many “gates” already. We don’t need another caustic moniker. In this toxic climate, legitimately aggrieved customers cannot easily step forward. The focus should be the device and whether there is a design flaw or owner error.
Amazon Warehouse Makes Me Mad
Yesterday, I made the mistake of ordering Harman/Kardon Nova speakers from Amazon Warehouse, which advertised: “Used, Like New. Item will come in original packaging. Packaging may be damaged. All accessories are present and undamaged”. Present, yes. Undamaged, no.
A cord connects the two speakers together, but the pins on one end were badly out of alignment. I did try to straighten out the damn things but failed. I’m not sure success would have been better than what happened: Demanding a refund (that will take days); writing a stinging one-star review; and reboxing and returning the Nova.
This Sign can’t be Good
While walking I saw this sign on the Adams Ave. bridge crossing the 805 here in San Diego. What? People park cars there to sell and must be warned not to? The hazard is obvious. […]
‘The Last Link You Will Ever Click’
Google got me. Not because I didn’t get the joke but for how far it actually goes. Perhaps you saw the April 1st post, “Re-rethinking computing“, which introduces the project from a “rogue team of engineers…Today, we’re excited to announce a way to make your Chromebook self-browsing”. Of course, it’s an April Fools gag.
I first saw the post on my Nexus 9 tablet while exercising on the stationary bike. Later, thinking to post a quickie to Google+, I pulled up the URL from synced History on Chromebook Pixel LS. On the N9, I had clicked the post’s last link, which did nothing special but when opened on the Pixel took me to the Chrome Web Store with option to install the self-browsing extension. Now that was unexpected. What to do, what to do?